on what i'm currently reading

I love reading. If I could somehow get paid to read, I would jump on that job so fast. I spend hours tucked away in the creases of an engrossing book. But a few months ago, I realized that I had stopped. It just didn't "fit my schedule" so I wasn't reading as much as I wanted. So I decided to put a stop on that real fast and came up with a goal: read one book a week.

Surprisingly, I've been able to stick with it for about the past 12 weeks. I'll read for about an hour or so during my "lunch break" or at any point that I have even 10 minutes of free time. Right now, I'm actually behind and it's taken me two weeks to read the book that I'm currently on: 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, but I'm soaking it in and reading it slowly. Here are the books that I've read so far in 2013:



My favorites so far have probably been EntreLeadership or Unmarketing. Fantastic and inspirational. I don't read a whole lot of fiction; not because I don't want to, but I have trust issues with fiction books. Unless it's recommended to me, I don't just try one out. I've been hurt too many times before. ;)

I've been using Goodreads to keep me on track. My goal is to read 36 books by the end of this year and according to the handy little widget on the right hand side of the blog, I'm behind. Nonetheless, it keeps me motivated and reminds me to do what I like to do. It gives me energy and inspiration. I always feel refreshed after reading a good book!

What books are you reading right now? Do you have any reading goals?

Oh! And get ready for round #3 of our 5 week series on learning your camera. This time around, we'll be talking about moving to manual! This is the crux of the whole series. Moving to manual is tantamount to getting fantastic photos and getting the full worth from your camera. I hope you'll join us. If you need to catch up, you can here.

stop thinking big, start doing small

 

I've been told my whole life to think big. And I'm good at it. I could think big until you and I are both blue in the face.

But actually doing something about it? Well, that's where I stop short. I freeze up. I have this grand idea, but then I look down and see that I've got nothing. And I suddenly become paralyzed, wondering how do I even get started?

I'm okay with thinking and dreaming big. But I'm not okay with doing small. I'm uncomfortable with doing small. Actually starting a dream means facing reality. It means facing failure. It means putting hours of work into something that may very well fail.

I'm sure that you've heard the statistic that 80% of businesses fail. Who knows where that came from, but it's probably about right. Every time that I heard that, I grew discouraged. 80%?! No matter how much hard work that I do, I could very easily get into that 80%. It would make me just want to throw up my hands and quit.

But then I heard a podcast from a highly intelligent woman. I wish that I remembered her name, but she was on Dave Ramsey's EntreLeadership podcast. She said that although that number, 80%, is true, it only accounts for businesses that have failed. It doesn't take into account entrepreneurs who have failed.

That really hit home.

Businesses fail. But entrepreneurs get back on their feet and start again. They create new businesses, analyze where they went wrong, and move forward; they watch some wither to the ground and others jump to the sky. Perhaps my business ideas may fail. But I won't. I'm going to keep moving.

on being an entrepreneur

I've been thinking a lot about being an entrepreneur these days. Ever since setting out on my own about 10 months ago, I've contemplated what this all even means. Some days, I feel like I've got this under control. I'm up and productive and other days, like today, I'm still in my pajamas, staring blankly at my planner.

Being an entrepreneur is deep in my veins. My mom started her own business over 10 years ago in a corner of her bedroom. It has since spread to its own location, several employees, and working closely with one of the largest retailers in the country. Growing up, I saw the freedom that having your own business can give you. The location of the business was in a cute little trailer in the back of our 4 acre property. Every morning, my mom would walk back to the office and work. She would walk back for lunch and then brisk back with her sandwich in hand for the afternoon. Her schedule was flexible and she had such freedom to go to our games, plays, and other events. I never knew my mom having a normal 8-5er. And when I was in high school, my dad quit his job and joined her. I saw what having a normal job did to him; he was constantly stressed. But working with my mom, they were here and happy.

Even my own grandma was an entrepreneur of sorts. She had 15 children - all with one man and no twins or triplets. She's over 80 now and has had two heart attacks. Until recently, she's lived alone and still gardens. So, really, she's just an insanely strong woman. I have a big legacy of people who have done remarkable things.

So maybe that's why I feel an entrepreneurial tug. I never saw myself as one who would start a business. But, looking back, it makes sense. I saw the freedom that owning a business can create. And really, being an entrepreneur requires a heap of creativity. You're creating and making and doing.

But I often fear being an entrepreneur. As an introvert, I don't like putting myself out there. I never know the line between networking and being desperate/clingy/needy. And then there's the problem of always a million ideas running through my head and determining which ones are actually any good.

But it's something that I can't get rid of. For years, I tried to convince myself that I was happy in an office, working for some one else. Even now, I still have days where I tell myself that I would be much more normal and happier if I just quit all of this nonsense and go back to a normal office. It doesn't take me long to remember, though, my 2 hour commuting days and the dreaded feeling of walking into the office and plopping into my chair for yet another day of answering phones.

Being an entrepreneur is hard, very hard. But often, the hardest things are the ones worth doing. So, I keep marching on with my millions of ideas and full acknowledgment that some days, I just don't know what I'm doing. And I keep looking forward to the future, to making mistakes, to taking action, to see what the next day holds.

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In other news, I'm excited to post week 2 of learning your camera on Friday! We'll be talking about lenses this time around, which you won't want to miss. There's power in your lens and if used properly, you can get stunning images. If you've missed week 1, you can see it here. Hope to see you on Friday!

 

healing

My heart is heavy. This week has been brutal. First, Boston; next, the West explosion.

We felt the explosion ourselves in our town that's 60 miles away. 60. That's over an hour away. The doors of the church swung open abruptly, then slammed shut. No one understood why; there hadn't been a gust of wind. Looking back, now we know that catastrophe had hit.

I was going to do an update on my current projects. But today isn't really a day to focus on those kinds of things. Today is a day of mourning, reflecting, and gratitude for what has been given to us.

Here are a few articles from around the web that I've found to be comforting and encouraging. May they be the same for you:

Why Gosnell, God? Why Boston?

When the Bombs Exploded in Boston

Three Things to Hold Onto When the World Is Falling Apart

 

Worth

Over the past few days, God has been pushing this idea of a human being's worth into my heart deeply. I've always known that human life is precious, worth fighting for, and a gift. But I confess that I don't know if I truly connected that to my own life and more specifically, to my own actions.

This idea was impressed in me even further when I read Carolyn Custis James' Half the Church. She discusses the root meaning of the word "woman", which in Hebrew is translated as a military term, ezer. So, God created women to be soldiers. Soldiers, warriors! To be armed with a weighty sword, with a purpose. God created us to be strong, to fight.

So often, however, I don't act this way. I resort to gossip, to piddling in my own puddle of mud, complaining that my sword isn't as big or sharp or shiny as the next woman's.

What a tragedy! Armed with the very living God inside of me, I could join the rest of the women and the human race, to take this world by storm. I am a child of the same God who creates earthquakes, builds and tears down nations, who uses the whole earth as his footstool. We are all vessels of His glory. How can we not shine or create or love fully if we have this God dwelling inside of us? We are human beings; we are women, masterpieces of His hands. This isn't simply a feel-good message. This is a life-altering call to radically move.

I ran across this quote from Marianne Williamson the other day that only reinforced the principle.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” - Marianne Williamson

We are children of God. So let's go change the world.

A Little Makeover

Like most things in life, movement is a good thing. Being stagnant is almost always not healthy and I'm working to make sure that this blog doesn't become that way.

So I've decided to make a few tweaks and to start adding things a little more regularly. I've done a steady amount of research on how to grow a blog and there's countless posts, books, articles, podcasts, tweets, you name it, all telling you how to do this. It's overwhelming, really. But the overall theme in all the advice I've seen is this: consistent and quality content.

Good content? My gears had trouble spinning and I became frustrated in figuring out how to deliver something of high quality. What could I write about that people would actually want to read? I came up with a list of ideas, but I got bored simply reading the list. How can I keep the content fresh, exciting, authentic?

Then it hit me in the car one day driving to get my hippy, organic shampoo.

In order to provide inspiration or encouragement, I have to live that way. I have to live the content that I want to create.

Do I want to be inspirational? Then may my days be filled with big ideas and the pursuit of such ideas.

Do I want to live minimally? Then may my days be filled with getting rid of what I don't need.

Do I want to encourage creative giving through businesses that give back? Then may I do that myself.

John Piper, in a recent podcast about a writer's influence, said it perfectly: "Writing is living and living is for the glory of God." I always pray that my writing would glorify God. Sometimes it's easy, though to let the words escape the lips and never permeate the flesh. If I want to glorify God in my writing, then I'll glorify Him with my life.

I'm going to live the content that I want to create.

Which will mean a few changes on the blog around here. Every week or so, I'll feature a business that's giving back or that allows you the option to give back. I'm giddy to share these with you!

I've also decided to start making this blog an outlet for you to get to know me, as a photographer and as a person. Writing is as deep a passion as photography. Why not combine them here?

My first philanthropy business post will be on Wednesday! Be on the look out - I'm so excited! :)

 

Creativity & Charity

I fiddled with the corner of the crisp white page. The paragraph had struck me hard, so hard that I had to read it again, then try to continue reading when all I could think about was the paragraph at the top of the page.

"Despite feeling overhwlmed and shamed at my ignorance [about HIV/AIDS], I decided it would be worse to curl up and forget about it than just dive in - ignorance and all. I could not imagine having to tell my children in thirty years, after my generation has handed this mess to them, 'Oh, yeah, I guess I did hear something about that back then, but I never did anything about it.'" - Shayne Moore, Global Soccer Mom

She was onto something. I've been surrounded lately by friends having babies. It's about that time in my life when people start spouting out the little ones. I'm not pregnant and don't plan on being too soon, but children are certainly, Lord willing, in my future. Consequently, nearly every time that I interact with a friend that has a newborn, I ask myself if I'll be a good mom. It's a legitimate question; one that I'm sure every woman with or without a child asks herself. We want to be good moms. But what does that mean?

To be honest, I don't really know. I'm sure I'll spend the rest of my life asking myself that question. But I do know one thing that I want to be for my kids: an example. I want for my kids to see me actively fighting for the poor and the weak and the infringed. To tell them to love the least of these, but to not do it myself would be fraud. It would be a waste of their time. I want to leave a legacy for my kids to love those that are in need, to reach out, to think outside of themselves. I don't want to tell them that we could have done something, but instead we did nothing.

This is one of the reasons why I've started this business. Creativity and charity are quickly becoming my dual passions. My heart starts to beat a little faster each time I hear about a business creating while giving. It just sounds so much like our God: a Creator and a Giver.

What do you think? How can you ensure a legacy to your kids that you helped those who most needed help?

Wet & Rainy

It's a wet and rainy day here in the suburbs of Dallas. I always like these kinds of days. The sound of rain is soothing and it makes me feel okay to sit in bed all day with a nice hot cup of raspberry tea and honey. I'm also trying to kick a nasty little cold that's creeping in. Maybe another cup of tea will do the trick.

Mission :: El Salvador

I had the joy of going to El Salvador with a small group from my church a few weeks ago. The mountains were gorgeous and the people, wonderful. We went to partner with a church in Ahuachapan, a small town near the border of Guatemala. The church was tiny - we doubled their size with our 24 people. We had a major language barrier - they spoke Spanish; we didn't. But, we worked through it with the help of some fabulous translators and, of course, wild hand gestures.

Each day, a group of us would go out and do a puppet performance for the little kids while another group would go to a park and do street evangelism. We traveled through heart-wrenching poverty where families lived in houses made of aluminum siding and a tarp for a roof. Many of those we met were refugees, from where we aren't sure. Many of the people there have nothing. For those who are doing really well, their monthly wage is about $300. It's a different world.

The church in Ahuachapan is wanting to expand to a new site that is closer to their current members and can reach a very impoverished area. We hope to visit again soon to help them build that new church.

While I was there, I felt like a tourist about 99% of the time because I was glued to my camera. It always dangled from my neck and I somehow lugged my 3 pound mega lens with me too. But, my official title on the trip was "photographer", so I guess it just comes with the gig. I'm pretty sure that one of my dream jobs would be to travel with missionary groups and take pictures for the organization or church...just throwing that out there. :)

Here's a sampling of some pictures. You can see plenty more on Flickr.

 

The Ezer Project {Personal Project}

"It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make an ezer suitable for him" (Genesis 2:18).

Ezer is the Hebrew word for a woman. Literally translated, it means "warrior". It's the same word that men in Israel's history would name their sons to indicate strength.

"Eve and all her daughters are ezers - strong warriors who stand alongside their brothers in the battle for God's kingdom." (Carolyn Custis James)

This personal photography project was inspired by a number of people, things, and Scripture verses. Ultimately, however, the purpose is to show the strength of all women THROUGH Christ alone. Each word written on each girl is a representation of the reality dwelling inside. We are tattooed with these attributes because of Christ and it makes us not weak damsels in distress, but valiant warriors standing together.

This is only the beginning of this project! More will be coming in time!

My Life via Instagram

It is not human nature to be wonder woman {Personal Post}

{jessicakertel1}

(Just as a warning, this post has very little to do with photography. But, let's be honest, this blog needs a little sprucing.)

Being out of college is tough. No more starting an Office marathon the week of finals at midnight. No more 6 week Christmas breaks. No more parents paying your bills. Those dreams of changing the world in only 6 months after getting out of college suddenly crumble under the crippling blow of a mortgage, 401k, electricity bill, utilities bill, and a 40-hour-a-week-bottom-of-the-totem-pole job. Now, I'm no longer in a rented house that I will leave in 9 months. I own this place, or so says the bank. And those super cute $50 shoes I've been eyeing? Forget about it.

It's true - I suffer from PCB...Post-College Blues. I was warned this could happen. But, I thought it might hit me for maybe a few weeks and I would get over it. But, alas, it's been a rather difficult road for me to become accustomed to life in the 'burbs.

Although the rows of perfectly trimmed lawns and structurally symmetric houses sometimes become tiresome, I have been experiencing the Bible in a whole new way. This verse has new life for me now: "I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want" (Philippians 4:12). 

It's been comforting to me to know that it's not within the human nature to be okay in any and every situation. It's not human nature to be wonder woman. Contentment is an attribute that is learned, in time, and experience - whether you're a new believer or the daring apostle Paul.

I'm not entirely sure what specific secret that Paul was talking about. It would have been kind of nice if he had written in nice big letters: "THE SECRET TO ALWAYS BEING HAPPY IN EVERY SITUATION IS THIS...." But, I suppose that God isn't aiming for our constant happiness. He's aiming at His glory through our sanctifying lives. So, I continue my 20-somethings learning what this secret is. Here's what I've found so far.

Prayer has been tantamount to a proper perspective and right attitude for me. Speaking with the Father is powerful and effective. I've dedicated a time for prayer for the youth group, where my husband is a pastor, once a week. I've seen an increased love, focus, and dedication in myself to seeing the youth and the church as a whole flourish in depth of life-changing stories.

New friendships are always difficult for me, but making a conscious effort to make new friends has also shifted my "woe is me" mentality to wanting to love others. I pull my head out of my kiddie pool of self-pity and actually interact with another human being and it leaves me feeling encouraged and challenged.

But, the most powerful has been reminding myself that there is a whole lot more to my life and to God's glory than me living downtown with a super sweet job and an even sweeter salary. If I truly am after pushing forward God's kingdom, then any sacrifice is worth it. Even if it means being a desperate creative in an office job an hour away. In the end, Christ died; Christ rose again; and Christ is coming again. Everything else will melt away.

I've heard that PCB (Post College Blues in case you missed that) can last up to 3 years. I see it disappearing, ever so slowly, as God continues to shape me. I will probably always struggle with being content, but I am ever grateful for such a powerful lesson in this stage of life. May He continue to shape me for His glory and His reputation.